growing up.

I've just said goodbye to Jake. He left for work seven minutes ago. I have this strange feeling inside of me. I'm not sure if it's good or bad. I think it's a sense of us growing up and becoming real life adults. He's finally got a job, sure it's not something we want him at forever, but it's great for right now. And I've got an interview at the bank, some place that I'd like to stay for awhile. Until we decide to move to Wyoming.

I cannot wait to see how my interview will go. I really do hope I get it. And if I do, I've got two weeks of training, which Mama Bear says should be paid; and if it was that would be awesome! I hope we can sell the Jeep soon so Jake and I can buy two cars. Then the ride thing won't make me so anxious. Sharing one car for four people is a little difficult. And if I start working, it'll be a lot more hard. Although, I will have a set schedule, Jake's changes. Things like this make me uneasy.

I'm growing up. And it's the scariest feeling. I have a dog and a cat and a hamster and some fish. Granted I don't have to take care of the dog right now, but we've got to take care of the other pets. And now we'll be working, paying for gas, car insurance, eventually phones, and rent. It will be scary and overwhelming at first. But I know we'll make it. I know we'll be able to handle it. I know we'll be okay.

And I'm still going wedding crazy. I keep looking wedding related things up, I keep thinking about sending save the dates, invitations, looking up wedding favors, thinking about center pieces, the cake, my dress, where we'll get married, who will marry us, the guest list, etc. Everything that comes with the wedding is running through my mind. I don't know when we'll get married, but I do know we'll be married in a few years and I do know it will be the best day of my life. I'm sure we won't have a honeymoon and that's completely fine with me. We could go to a bed and breakfast for a weekend, something along those lines. Something that won't be crazy expensive.

I cannot wait to make everything for our wedding. I cannot wait to have Jake help with making some of the things. I cannot wait!

I really want that bank job. We can start saving for our wedding, now. Sure it's sort of crazy, but we'll have money and we'll be able to get married and move out and start a family in a few years after that. I'm so glad and unbelievably lucky to have found Jake. And I'm so glad and lucky we are in love and will get married, to each other.