So, it's a no-go on the bank. They picked someone else, but the lady said that I did awesome and that there was nothing I did wrong. And she asked me if she could keep my stuff on file so she could call me if something opens up. So hopefully when we've got the Jeep all fixed up and sold and Jake and I each have a car, they'll call and I'll be ecstatic and more prepared and we won't have to worry about the one car thing. Which is really a damper. But it's whatever. So right now, I'm not really looking for a job, I guess. Which makes me feel like a complete loser and failure. But I guess there's a good reason why I don't necessarily need to get one right this second. Maybe I'll try to make some stuff and sell it? I don't know. I've made plenty of bracelets and I think I've sold about two. Maybe I'll try necklaces. I'd love to draw/paint something and sell it, but I feel like no one would want it. Who knows. I'm just feeling really lost right now. And I feel like since Jake is doing all of the working for now I have to make sure that I don't cause fights and that I have to make sure everything is perfect. And I don't want to mess anything up. I don't know why I'm feeling all of this, but I am. And we've been doing some major cleaning, moving, and fixing up of the house, and it's starting to come along great.
I'm just sort of really confused and lost right now. I would love to have a job and feel like less of a loser, but I guess that's not in the cards right now.
Who knows. I'm just feeling really weird and I don't really know what to say or what to do or what to think. I feel like I've fallen flat on my face.
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